How Bonnie Got Her Groove Back
by Lana Archer
Summary: When Bonnie and Damon return from the Other, Other Side a few things have changed for our favourite witch. She has a new lease on life and is quickly deviating from what everyone has come to expect from her. She's finally decided to put herself first and it's about damn time.
1. Chapter 1

_**Step One: Follow Your Instincts**_

It had been a few weeks since Bonnie and Damon returned from the _Other_ Other side. Caroline being Caroline decided to throw the duo a 'welcome-back-thanks-for-not-really-being-dead' party. Everyone who was still alive and newly alive was there. When Jeremy arrived at the Boarding House stag everyone asked where she was. Surely Bonnie would be at his side twenty-four seven? Apparently not. Jeremy sulked off to a corner where he nursed his bottle of beer with a deep scowl etched on his face. Damon shrugged when Elena shot him a questioning glance. He and Bonnie had had an understanding since their return and truly they were the only ones who were on the same wave length. They gave up trying to play catch up with everyone and just took the time to acclimate to actually existing again. Damon was about to pull out his cell phone out to call Bonnie when she walked into view.

"_See_," he said nudging Elena, "there she is, she's _fine_. Can you blame her for wanting some space from Gilbert? It's been a week and I'm already sick of him." Elena tutted at him but sped over to her friend and pulled her into a hug. Bonnie smiled back genuinely but timidly before she was squeezed by Caroline. Enzo chuckled darkly next to Damon.

"She **_is_ **fine." He commented before walking away to refresh his drink and Damon narrowed his eyes at his retreating figure before looking back at Bonnie.

"Hey guys" she said shyly and the two vampires did a double take. Bonnie was wearing black high-waisted leather shorts with sky high studded ankle boots and a thin white tank top with a maroon blazer over it. Her make-up was smokey-eyed and her lips were a deep crimson. Her hair was back to its familiar length and hung down her back in straight lines.

"Bon, you look _hot_!" Caroline exclaimed, wriggling her eyebrows appreciatively. Bonnie giggled and blushed behind her hand.

"Thanks Care, you look wonderful as always," she complimented in kind, "You too Elena, obviously. Gosh, it's weird being back." she pulled a face as she scoured the room.

"_No_," Caroline disagreed as she led her to the makeshift bar, "What's weird is you never having worn that outfit before." Bonnie laughed as she chose between beer and whiskey. Choosing the latter she was intercepted by Stefan who smiled that heart-warming smile of his.

"Allow me" he said and began pouring her drink for her.

"Thanks" Bonnie said as she turned to face the crowd, when she spotted Jeremy he sneered and left the room. Sighing she turned back in time to receive the drink from Stefan and she smiled.

"So when did you break up with him?" Stefan asked without preamble. Bonnie opened her mouth to lie but he stopped her with a pointed look. Exhaling she turned to face him fully and wriggled her mouth left and right before answering.

"Like, an hour ago I think?" she said eventually, cracking a smile which Stefan reciprocated easily. "What did he say?"

"Oh he didn't have to _say_ anything, his face said it all" Stefan chuckled into the mouth of his beer bottle. "I gotta say though, I'm not really surprised."

"Oh?" she asked, sipping daintily on her drink with a brow lifted. Stefan hummed playfully.

"Nope," the younger Salvatore said, "It was inevitable really." Bonnie snickered at that.

"You could say we were doomed from the beginning." She shook her head and raised her glass at Alaric across the room who was talking to Damon and Elena, he mirrored her, "But seriously, I feel happier now. Stefan, I've done a shit load of dying and almost _no_ living. Now, instead of getting all Bella Swan about it I'm taking the bull by the horns. I'm getting my mojo back." Stefan nodded thoughtfully.

"I like it," he admitted with a proud smile, "I like this too by the way," he said gesturing to her outfit, "Suits you." Bonnie curtseyed.

"Why thank you," she said taking another sip, "but if you'll excuse me, I believe I owe one peppy blonde vamp a dance."

"Damnstraight bitch" Caroline called out as she skipped over to Bonnie and they went to change the song. Suddenly _Show Me_ by Bruno Mars started playing while Damon sidled up to Stefan.

"She's something else huh?" Stefan commented as he watched Bonnie wind her hips in time with the reggae song. Elena joined in but honestly, every male in the room had their eye on the girl who died more often than she'd dated. Bonnie laughed and clapped along as she danced with her friends; finally looking she was having a good time.

"Who? Bonnie?" Damon asked tracing his bottom lip with his tongue before taking another sip. Stefan stared at him drolly before replying.

"_Yes Bonnie_, genius. Look how happy she is." Damon had to admit his brother had a point. But then again, he'd been seeing a completely different side of Bonnie since they died together, all Shakespearean and shit.

"Yeah, she's finally growing into that scowl of hers," Damon said before getting a faraway look in his eyes, "But I mean yeah, she's great. I finally get the whole thing with Lexi I think." Stefan's face was a mask of shock.

"**_You_**? You understand what love means? Please brother, _do_ go on" Stefan goaded him. Damon simply chuckled and turned his eyes back to the dancing girls.

"Don't read into it too much Steffy," Damon said, straightening his back and grinning when Elena locked eyes with him as she danced, "She wasn't the only one that learned a thing or two in our stint in Limbo." He tapped the edge of his tumbler to Stefan's bottle and walked off. Stefan chortled into the mouth of his drink as he watched Elena kiss Damon's cheek and him squeeze her upper arm in return. Caroline cheered as the song ended and high-fived Bonnie before going off to find Tyler. Damon ruffled Bonnie's hair as Elena said something to Matt and she smacked his hand away and took his drink from him and ran off before he could do anything.

"I'll get you yet Bennett!" Damon called after her as Elena wound her arms around his waist with a broad smile and Bonnie hid behind Alaric with a mischievous smirk on her face as he laughed at their antics. How strange, at some point, through the bulk of it all, they seemed to have emerged as some kind of…dare Stefan even think it? _Family_? Just then Jeremy skulked passed Stefan, muttered a goodbye and stormed out.

Eh, some things change, some stay the same.


	2. Chapter 2

**Why those writers have revolved around a crying Elena for five seasons (going on _six_?) is beyond me, _but_, I digress.**

**You're lovely for liking this.**

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><p><strong>Step Two: Be a little selfish<strong>

Bonnie Bennett and 'selfish' didn't go in the same sentence. That was more Damon's forte, and notoriously so. _Ask_ him, he wouldn't bother denying it. Bonnie, and pretty much anyone who knew her, thought she'd harbour a grudge against the supernatural world for as long as she'd lived. Little did anyone know that the first vampire to threaten her (**and everything that came after that**) would be the one to help her come full circle. Damon, all things considered, could be really convincing when he wanted to be. Between him and Bonnie they'd managed to butt heads like sour siblings, rant like a geriatric couple, fight alongside like lifelong _parabatai_ and finally come to an understanding. So when Damon granted her an audience with his actual honest opinion, who was she to turn down that opportunity? Sifting through the boxes Caroline had packed of her things in her father's house, she couldn't help but drift back to one especially profound moment with the elder Salvatore.

_**"Bonnie," he was saying, his eyes and eyebrows doing that thing where they managed to portray as much, if not more, of a patronizing tone than his words. "Hear me out okay?" Bonnie sighed heavily and looked up at him with a face that told him exactly how much time he had before she changed her mind. "I know we don't have the most amicable -" her pursed lips cut off his words and he pinched his face before he blew out a breath, "You know what?" He asked, stepping further into her space, "We know my apologies are mediocre at best, I am terrible with remorse but what I am good at, is spotting a lost cause when I see one," Bonnie rephrained from commenting, "I mean **_**now**_**, Bonnie, could you stop it with the snarky eyes for a minute, at least?" He asked, knowing exactly where her thoughts were at the moment - on the past, **_**his**_** to be more specific.**_

_**"Get to the point Damon." She sighed. The corner of his eyes tightened as he held her gaze for a moment before continuing.**_

_**"My point, is we could be friends. People like you and me - we're honestly better off on the same side, **_**but**_**, for the right reasons. We're **_**here**_** Bennett, you may as well get used to the sight of perfection that is my face because **_**face**_** it, this might be it for us and I'd really prefer all our back and forth to end on a good note. I've had enough regrets to last me a thousand lifetimes."**_

_**"Damon-"**_

_**"Ah, bu-bu-buh," He said wagging a finger in front of her face as he cut her off, "I wasn't finished. I'm tired of this Bonnie, aren't **_**you**_**? The fighting, the losing and the 'almosts' that are honestly just no longer good enough? You deserve better and despite what anyone says, so do I. You deserve better than that runt who scampers around committment like it's his first time, **_**every**_** time. And me? I deserve to learn the difference between what I do or don't deserve. I deserve to have a friend as judgey and condescendingly supportive as you and you deserve someone as liberating and callous as me. It's practically science Bon-Bon, we balance each other out. Instead of fighting against each other we should team up, combine our forces!"**_

_**"You couldn't resist reinacting the scene in the movie where the bad guy pitches the good guy to join the dark-side, could you?" Bonnie said, a subtle glimmer in her green eyes as she looked up at him curiously. He smiled as he shook his head.**_

_**"For **_**once**_**," Damon said lifting a hand and raising a forefinger between them, "Could you indulge me?" Her eyebrows rose but the smallest smile blossomed on her face and Damon counted this as a success. Rolling her eyes she shoved at his shoulder lightly.**_

_**"This is because I was nice to you the other day wasn't it?" Bonnie asked as she stepped around him, "I knew that was a bad call." She spun around so he could see the mirth in her eyes. They both knew how grateful Damon was to Bonnie for putting up with his hysteria and anger over the last, who knows how long? Bonnie had pushed through his walls and shown Damon that as long as he'd lived, he still hadn't seen it all. She'd even held him while he cried for good measure, because Bonnie Bennett was a **_**good**_** person, she was a care-giver and Damon Salvatore was a man who needed to know that not all love had to end in a horror movie. "In all seriousness," she said as their faces returned to neutrality, "I agree with you and despite it all, **_**yes**_**, I am on board."**_

_**"...**_**Really**_**?" Damon asked, like he just knew she was joking. She nodded as she folded her arms across her chest.**_

_**"Really, Damon. Consider us friends." A smile so sincere shifted between their two faces and Bonnie just knew this was when the adventure really began.**_

She hadn't even realised the soft, breathy laugh had escaped her until she locked eyes with Caroline. The blonde's perfect brows arched and Bonnie shrugged.

"Memories." The Bennett girl explained.

* * *

><p>Later that day Bonnie was walking past store windows, lost in her own head when her face collided with one very solid chest.<p>

"Ow!" She yelped, reeling backward, "I mean, _sorry_, but mostly ow." A pair of hands steadied her and she had her apologetic smile at the ready when the man spoke.

"Well if it isn't the girl who lived?" An accented voice inquired, immediately garnering Bonnie's attention. She scowled up at Enzo and shook her head at him.

"Is that a Harry Potter reference or are you just happy to see me?" She sassed. Enzo's features crumpled a little in confusion. "Forget it, see you around." She made to move past him but he intercepted her stealthily, of course.

"Not so fast, I thought we could chat."

"I'm sure you've heard, but I'm full up on one-on-one chats with vampires, so if you'll excuse me-" She tried to side step him again, but to no avail. He held up his hands in an attempt to pacify her so she huffed a little but stayed put.

"We have the same best friend don't we?" He asked his dark eyes clouding over with something between mirth and danger, a force of habit Bonnie supposed, "I'm curious as to what else we have in common."

"Since when is Damon my best friend?" Bonnie asked, trying her best not to laugh aloud at the image in her head of Damon in a onesie, slumber-party-ready.

"Since you two died and took all the fun with you." The vampire pointed out, an edge to his tone. Bonnie scoffed and couldn't help the humourless smile that quirked her mouth.

"_Fun_? I -" she sucked in a breath before forging on, "Am _not_ going to justify that with a response. Look, **yes**, Damon and I are closer than anyone thought naturally plausible but that's just how it is now and as fun as it's been standing out here measuring dicks with you, if you want to fix whatever is going on between the two of you I suggest you do that and you know, _keep it_ between the two of you?" She patted his shoulder and shoved past him, shaking her head as she walked away.

* * *

><p>When Bonnie dropped onto one of the plush couches in the den she sighed happily, finding relief in being off of her feet. Coming back from the dead racked up way too many errands in her opinion. Stefan chuckled as he sat reading in a corner opposite her while Damon fiddled over the options at the wet bar as he mixed himself a drink. Bonnie waved off his offer.<p>

"Long day?" Damon asked over his shoulder and Bonnie hummed in affirmation.

"Your boyfriend tried to corner me into 'having a chat' with him." She explained, lifting her hands to make quotes with her fingers.

"Enzo is rather territorial isn't he?" Stefan commented casually as he flipped a page. Bonnie giggled softly.

"Shush you two," Damon quipped softly as he plonked down next to Bonnie, "Can we _blame_ him though?" He waved a hand over his person and both Bonnie and Stefan groaned and rolled their eyes. Just as Damon muttered something about sorting Enzo out Jeremy walked in and immediately skid to a halt. His eyes were locked on Bonnie's lazy form as she lay there, sinking into the couch.

"I suppose I should get used to this." The Gilbert boy said, his tone sullen. Stefan's eyes moved to Bonnie and Damon's faces to gage their reactions, while she averted her eyes momentarily and he shrugged as if to say 'pretty much'. Bonnie looked at Jeremy then and as if sensing what she was about to do Damon's hand flitted to her shoulder faster than the blink of an eye. Bonnie's eyes shot to Damon's face and she sighed. Stefan was fascinated by how a mere glance at one another, both Bonnie and Damon were able to convey enough to come to an understanding. Looking back to Jeremy Bonnie's mouth fell open and for a second or so she fumbled.

"I suppose you should." She said, "We're all adults here, right?" Her tone wasn't severe or even remotely testy, she was simply making a valid statement. Jeremy looked between the trio in front of him before beginning to nod slowly.

"...Right." He said and promptly left the room. Damon patted Bonnie's leg with a proud smile.

"That wasn't so bad now was it?" Damon teased, earning him a glare from the girl beside him.

* * *

><p><strong>'Bamon' working through their respective issues with one another while they were 'wherever' is the central story of all this. Damon and Bonnie are on the same wavelength here after spending all that time together and it shows. I don't know how this ends really, but Bonnie is done being a plot device.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**This Chapter starts off with another flashback to a Bamon 'moment' that was hinted at previously. I love the idea of Damon being able to be vulnerable and honest and open with Bonnie. She has just enough compassion to support him through what he's going through without enabling him or excusing his behaviour. Which, _logically_, is exactly what he needs.**

**Sorry for the long note. **

**Oh, you guys are the best. Really, really.**

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><p><strong>Step Three: Don't Forget Who You Really Are<strong>

**_Bonnie knew that the spending an eternity with Damon was a possibility. She knew this and she was trying her very best to accept it. She also knew that he, in his own way, was trying his very best to accept it too. Bonnie was used to being made out to be strong, loyal and reliable when it mattered the most - when lives were at stake and she was the _only_ option left. What she wasn't used to though however, was being relied on for being _just_ who she was. For instance, she hadn't simply consoled someone in so long in a way that relied simply on her support and presence as opposed to her powers. So when the moment called for it, she rose to the occasion. It was jarring, to find Damon in the state that he was. Damon was chaos, fire and destruction, she was used to that, but _this_ time - this time was _different_. She found him out in the field they had first woken up in when they were sucked into Oblivion. She could tell, even from afar that his fight had been snuffed out. His broad shoulders were hunched over instead of the strong posture he usually carried. When she sat down next to him he didn't even move, or blink, but the slow rise and fall of his chest set her at ease, however slight. She scoured his profile quickly, clinically, assessing the damage. Without a word she snaked her hand through until it reached his and she wove there fingers together, keeping her eyes on the horizon in front of them. Damon flinched, but she knew he couldn't help it. He was the kind of person who second-guessed everything, read into every detail and built up a world of paranoia and insecurity around the smallest details. He was probably thinking of a way to be rid of her this very moment._**

**_"You shouldn't be here." He muttered. _See_? Bonnie sighed and nodded before scooting closer to him and resting her head on his shoulder. His entire frame was rigid. It damn near broke her heart for him._**

**_"Wrong," she said softly, casually, "You're the one who technically shouldn't be here, remember?" She didn't pause to let him interupt as he was want to do, "But we both know we're better off here with some chance at getting back and we both know that we're better off together so try and push me away all you want but I'm not leaving." She let her words hang between them for a few moment. She adjusted herself to be more comfortable as she rested on him. "I'm here for you Damon. I'm right _here_." There was a tense silence while a soft breeze moved around them and the soft calls of birds sounded in the distance. "Does it hurt?" She asked softly after a minute or so._**

**_"Worse than I'd ever imagined." He replied, his voice so soft it bled into the breeze as a whisper._**

**_"I don't know what you need right now," Bonnie began, lifting her head to face him. He still hadn't moved. "But I know when I'm sad and I'm hurting, all I need to know is that someone, just _one_ someone, cares and has my back. So I want you to know that _I_ care and _I_ have your back and I want to help." Damon's face twisted into a scowl and she readied herself for a swift rebuttal._**

**_"I don't deserve your help." He hissed lowly. Shoving down her surprise she forged on._**

**_"Does any of that even matter anymore?" She asked, even though, somewhere deep down inside she feared that it always would. Damon turned his face to her then and sneered before speaking._**

**_"I get it now," he said his voice low and sad, "That's why you're still with Jeremy, that's why you're _always_ putting it all on the line for Elena, for Caroline, Matt, Stefan and _me_ and _anyone_ else who gets close enough to that Martyr complex of yours. You're too _good_, Bonnie. It's sickening. Look at us. Look at the facts. I'm on one end of the spectrum and you're on the other and yet somehow, we're _here_, we're _dead_ and what does that make of everything we've ever done, huh?"_**

**_"Damon," Bonnie interrupted her voice quick and serious, "We're not doing this. We're not re-hashing the past, we're not attacking each other and we're sure as hell not going to spend the indefinite amount of days we have left wallowing. I know that you've lost a lot and I know what that's like so don't tell me I don't know how to help you and don't shut me out because _this_ Damon, _this_, _here_ - _us_? This is possibly as good as it gets, okay? So we need to actually push past all this crap and try and stay in one piece. _You_ need to stay in one piece Damon. It hurts to keep hoping but right now, hope is all we have. So..."_**

**_"Hope has done nothing but disappoint me." He said after the longest moment. They sat there, looking at each other for the longest time. Damon's face crumpled slowly, and Bonnie's heartbeat sped as she realised how much pain he was in and how much it took to let it come up to the surface. Without even a first thought to it Bonnie moved and got onto her knees and pulled Damon's body to her chest and she held him while he cried. She couldn't help as her own tears began to fall in reponse to the utter heart ache that was present in his voice as he cried. His arms curled around her hips and he cried into her torso. Bonnie would never forget this moment for as long as she lived...if she ever got to live again that is. The world, or whatever semblance of it that was left to them moved around them without disturbing this one moment that had changed them both irrevocably._**

"Everything okay?" Stefan asked and Bonnie blinked rapidly to bring herself back to reality and throw a placatory smile at the younger Salvatore.

"Yeah," Bonnie said, nodding her head repeatedly, "It's just gets weird for me. I feel like I'm still in limbo, sometimes." Stefan nodded in that serious, fatherly way of his and crossed his arms.

"Seems like a natural reaction to me." Stefan said with a small smile. Bonnie's eyes dropped to her feet and she sighed.

"_Okay_," Stefan said drawing out the word and stepped over to hug her and she sunk into his embrace. "You've been through so much I think you need like... A break."

"A _break_?" Bonnie echoed, her voice muffled into the fabric of his shirt. He held her at arm's length as he nodded. "No, I think I need to...get back into the rythm of everything."

"The 'rhythm of everything'?"Stefan echoed, shaking his head, "Where's the good in that? This town, this lifestyle is not conducive to sanity or even a _semblance_ of normalcy. Bonnie you need to get out and do something different."

"Oh, yeah?" Bonnie asked, deciding to humour him, "And what's that?" He was about to say something when Damon's voice called out instead.

"Roadtrip!" The elder Salvatore called. "Yes! Let's do it."

* * *

><p>"Remind me again why we're doing this?" Bonnie asked a few days later, as Elena and Stefan double checked that everything was packed. Damon scoffed as he put his cellphone in his jean pocket and then grinned at Bonnie.<p>

"We're doing this because this town is poison and we all need a breath of fresh air." Just then honks sounded as more cars pulled into the driveway. Caroline and Tyler pulled up in her car with Alaric and Enzo in another. Bonnie turned back to stare up at Damon, her face telling him exactly what she thought of this idea. She held her hand up as he thought to open his mouth.

"_Don't_ ask me to indulge you, you know I can't get out of this now anyway." She twitched, wanting more than anything to hit some part of him when Elena sidled up to them.

"That's right," Elena said smiling at Bonnie before snaking her arm through the crook of Damon's elbow, "Everything's already packed and everyone's here."

"Well, not everyo-" Damon's words were interrupted by a quick jab to the ribcage from his girlfriend and both Bonnie and Elena chuckled as he winced. Stefan stepped up to them as well, signalling that everything was packed.

"I still don't get how your guys' idea of a road trip and holiday is going to the _lake house_?" Bonnie said, her arms crossed with a delicate frown on her face. Stefan and Damon groaned and descended on her, ushering her into Stefan's Porsche and once she was inside, Damon and Elena made their way to his Camaro. Caroline frowned when she spotted a fleeting look pass over Elena's features when the Salvatore's were fussing over Bonnie to get her into the car. By the time Damon had turned around a bright smile was on Elena's face and Caroline was left wondering if she'd imagined it.

"Ready to go?" Tyler asked from the passenger seat. Caroline started a little but covered it up with one of her signature smiles, all the while wondering if bringing Tyler along was a good idea. Neither really knew where they stood with the other but after losing Bonnie and Damon everyone banded together in solidarity, trying to stay strong.

"_Yes_." The pretty blonde said with a determined nod and a bright smile as she started the engine and followed the parade of cars as they all left the Salvatore driveway.

* * *

><p>"What do you wanna listen to?" Stefan asked as he grinned wickedly after over-taking his brother on the road and watching as Alaric did the same. Bonnie snickered and shrugged as she adjusted her cat-eyed shaped sunnies.<p>

"Something catchy we can sing along to." Stefan pulled a face and Bonnie lifted her eyebrows.

"This was _your_ idea Stefan, the least you could do is sing a few songs with me." His eyes flickered to her and he smiled.

"Alright, alright." He conceded easily, fiddling with the buttons until a classic blared through his speakers.

_Making my way down town_

_Walking fast, faces pass and I'm homebound_

Bonnie let out a small squeak and clapped her hands excitedly as Stefan swung his head this way and that as he sang the words. Singing through her laughter they were soon fully caught up in the silly moment. Alaric and Enzo stayed close to the rear of Stefan's car and began chuckling when they saw Bonnie's small arms waving this way and that as she sang along.

"I don't know what's weirder," Alaric wondered aloud as he peaked into his review mirror and spotted Damon and Elena laughing at something before his eyes flickered back to the front, "The fact that Stefan knows the words or that he and Bonnie have managed to harmonise on top of it all." Enzo shrugged offhandedly.

"I've given up trying to make sense of Bonnie since she's returned, not that I knew much of her from before, but, that girl? She's a conundrum on her own." Back in the car with Bonnie and Stefan she sighed as the was a dip in the song and looked over at Stefan.

"Okay, I'll admit it," She said unable to stop smiling, "Maybe this **was** a good idea." Stefan looked at her incredulously.

"This is a _brilliant_ idea." He insisted chuckling at her bright smile.

"It is pretty brilliant." She assented. Stefan preened and batted his eyelashes at her admission and Bonnie couldn't help laughing.

* * *

><p><strong>IF I COULD FALL, INTO THE SKY<strong>

**DO YOU THINK TIME, WOULD PASS ME BY?**

**Heh, could not resist the fluffy brilliance that is a happy Stefan/Bonnie interaction**


	4. Chapter 4

_**I wish I could show you guys the dance I did when I stepped into the world that is Bamon on Tumblr. You'll just have to believe me when I say every move was executed with the grace of a SWAN. **_**Yes**_**.**_

_**Oh, before I forget. This goes back to Beremy break-up and Bonnie's thought process behind that and soon the blanks will be filled and mouths will be agape with joy and excitement. Oh no wait, that's just me**_

_**I disclaim everything except that dance Ian did for that "Whatta Man" Bonnie/Damon scene. I taught him everything he knows.**_

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><p><strong>Step Four: Tell The Truth<strong>

Bonnie knew that the next few words out of her mouth would change everything. Yet there she sat, across from Jeremy, ready to change her future. She knew, deep inside how much Jeremy loved her, but she also knew, equally, how much she had changed and how much Jeremy's love was no longer... _enough_? Jeremy's idea of love was child's play and timid. Bonnie's true idea of love was irrevocable, passionate, loyal and all-consuming. Which is why Bonnie came to understand Damon's love for Elena. Because she knew she wanted the kind of love that made all the heartache worth **something** in the end. Yet, Bonnie also wanted the kind of love that made something to come home to; no second-guessing, no 'almosts', no doubts - just the kind of love that silenced everything around it. The kind of love that answered all the questions, the kind of love people made lee-way for. The kind of love she'd always read about. She wanted the kind of love that left no stone un-turned. She was also tired of being a _stepping_ stone, of being a _consolation_ prize. Jeremy wasn't doing it on purpose she knew, but the fact of the matter was that she felt like she wasn't good enough. All they'd ever done was try and fight against the wall of death that was always lined up between the two of them. Bonnie would never regret bringing him back from the dead, she would do it time and time again. Because that's who she **was**. She was the girl who made the sacrifices, who smiled through the pain, who understood that not everyone was willing to do the same things that she did - whether they were for her or not. But _now_, she'd also become the girl who knew that she was worth sacrificing something _for_. She knew that she was worth more than whatever it was that she had been getting before her and Damon died together. So when she came back she was invariably changed as a woman. And Jeremy, as harsh as it sounded, was simply **no longer enough**.

"We need to break up." She squeezed out the words passed her gritted teeth, already expecting the worst. Jeremy's still child-like face crumpled in confusion before it reddened and anger took over.

"_Break_ up?" He echoed lowly, surprisingly his expression then reminded her of Damon's usual sneering but she brushed off the wayward thought. Nodding simply she sighed as she crossed her legs as she sat outside in her backyard in the cast iron garden chairs her dad had picked out back pre-Salvatore invasion. _What a beautiful day to waste in tired arguments_, Bonnie groaned inwardly.

"Yes, Jer. We need to break up." She said, her voice firm. "We're both still young, I mean you..." She waved a hand towards him as her voice trailed off, both of them thinking about his recent conquests, "...and I'm not happy stuck in this same state that I have been for who knows _how_ long. I need time Jeremy. To do something other than die for Elena and try and pretend that we're still in a functioning relationship." He looked as if he'd been kicked in the gut by her pretty black studded ankle boots. "I _need_ this Jeremy, for once, I'm doing something for myself and if you love me as much you say you do you'd want me to be happy."

"Of course I _love_ you Bonnie," the boy bit out, "All I've been doing for as long as I can remember is _mourn_ you!" He snapped. Bonnie didn't bother getting offended by that. She understood his sentiment.

"Did I _ask_ you to mourn me? What I did for you, I didn't do it because I loved you or because Elena needed you or because you deserved to live - Jeremy I did it because it's _who I am._ It's what Grams taught me to stand by. If I can't use what was given to me to help the one's I love then why be myself at all? Why have the powers that I have? Why even bother with love? Jer, all I wanted was for you to love me. But something was always getting in the way. A spell, a death, our deaths, something and how much longer did you think we could play 'catch-up' for?" She asked, lifting her delicate brows as if to punctuate her sentence, "You need to realize that everything that's happened with us, **all** of us, has happened in a rush. We've been living this fast-paced, adrenaline-pumping lifestyle for _so_ long that we think so much time has passed when really it's been a matter of moments in the greater scheme of things. _Yes_, the stakes have always been high, since the day Stefan walked into my history class everything changed. But do I regret meeting him? Do I regret any of it? _No_. Regretting and resenting the supernatural world for being what it is, is a pointless endeavour. I'm a _witch_ and you're a _hunter_. Damon's an _asshole_ and Caroline still thinks that crossing your fingers and wishing on stars encourages good _karma_. These things won't ever change, we are who we are and we loved each other Jeremy, but it's time for us to move on."

"I'm not moving on! I just got you back!" He exclaimed.

"I'm not going anywhere," Bonnie said, knowing full well that no one could ever really guarrantee that, especially in this town, "I still love you and I'll **always** be in your corner when you need me. But I can't be your girlfriend. Not when I don't even know who I am anymore." Jeremy's face was incredulous. Just then Bonnie's phone vibrated loudly. Pulling out the device she swiped through and hurriedly texted Caroline back, stating for the umpteenth time that **yes**, she was coming to the damn party. Looking back up at Jeremy she watched him as his gaze was lost somewhere in the wild flowers that had been in full bloom since her return.

"So that's it then? We're done?" Jeremy asked, his dark brown eyes returning to Bonnie's full green orbs. She nodded and exhaled shakily. "You're pretty well put together for someone who claims to be _'falling apart'_." He said off-handedly. She only just resisted rolling her eyes.

"I didn't say I was falling apart Jeremy, in fact, I'm pretty sure what I am doing is finally putting myself together." She thought that she'd made an excellent point but Jeremy's expression begged to differ. Just when she thought he was going to sound the bell for round two his shoulders slumped over and he seemed to sink in on himself. She didn't know why this surprised her - it was the way he _always_ reacted. Firing at all pistons for all of five seconds before succumbing to his circumstance. Damon was right, Jeremy **was** still a child. Bonnie remembered arguing with the blue eyed vampire on more than one occasion about either Gilbert and Damon had always insisted that Jeremy would never catch up with her.

"Whatever. I'm going to the Boarding House." Jeremy muttered, standing to his feet and storming off through her house and to his black pick-up. Bonnie sighed and rolled her neck, liking how her hair moved with her - she'd missed the length. Her eyes went in and out of focus as her thoughts began to pick up their pace. Breaking up with Jeremy hadn't been anywhere near the list of things she'd planned to do if she ever made it back to her world. Then again, being 'besties' (as the idiot liked to call it) with Damon was never on the cards either. Yet, there she was. All dressed up with a 'Thanks For Coming Back From The Dead, Again :/" party to go to.

With her ex-boyfriend, her new best friend (yes, Damon), his bourbon buddies, her sandbox siblings and hopefully enough booze to smooth everything over. She hoped there was something strong enough to even get a dance out of her. Or strong enough to coerce her into Caroline's shenanigans, either way. She needed a breather. Standing to her feet she moved further into the greenery that was her back garden. Raising her palms upward and smiling at the familiarity of it all she began to chant spells of livelihood and prosperity over the flora. The atmosphere was electric and she could feel her power tingling on her fingertips, the tip of her nose and across the surface of her smooth skin. She'd missed this, the serenity that came with her magic. The _balance_. The _unity_ with everything around that afforded her sweet, short moments of bliss. Moments she'd gone beyond relying on. Moments she now savoured, treasured and basked in.

Bonnie dropped her arms to her sides and admired her handiwork. There were roses, peonies, lilies, _her favourites_ - sunflowers, daisies and tulips - all in full bloom. She grinned; she was a Bennett witch that had toyed with the balance of death more times than anyone had any business even contemplating and she was **_still alive._** She was still home, after everything she'd lost and for a split second there she ran the risk of being the same snivelling tween who'd lay herself down at Elena's altar at whoever's beck and call. **No more of that**, Bonnie promised herself. Friendship was about more than love and sacrifice, friendship was also about communication, trust, respect and _synergy_. Her and Elena's friendship had become a warped ugly thing since vampirism was thrown into the equation and though _yes_, ask anyone and they could come up with at least three excuses for Elena's actions. Everyone in their circle knew the drill, save Elena and maybe you'll have something of your own to go home to. **Maybe**. If you weren't fighting for Elena you were fighting _against_ her and that was punishable by death. _In fact_, helping Elena turns out to be punishable by death as well. Bonnie had found that out the hard way and none of that was good enough anymore. The assumed gratuity, the innate onus and obligatory approach that Bonnie had taken toward most, if not all of her relationships in Mystic Falls. It was quite a bummer when she thought about everything in hindsight.

When she died she'd thought that she'd come to terms with so much; that she'd gone out with a proverbial good-for-me _'bang'_. She was naïve until her very end. Bonnie kept learning every day how little she knew about the truths of the world, how little she knew about _herself_ and how _badly_ she wanted to learn more. She knew that she couldn't keep neglecting herself for others, and she knew that she should be respected more, hell, even feared by the supernaturals who were still sticking it out in Mystic Falls. Bonnie had drawn the line with Damon so she could do it with anyone else too, and she _would_. Gone are the days where she'd act as a disgruntled waitress while people snapped their fingers and made impossible demands of her. She would **always** be the girl willing to fight, yes, that would never change - but _now_? She'd be damned if she fought alone. And Bonnie was acutely aware of how alone she really was now. She thought losing Grams was the worst thing to happen to her and then she lost her father and then herself, even Abby was lost to her. Bonnie knew she needed to step up and make the right choice. She needed to live and not keep _re_living the hideousness that was her past. Jumping a little when her phone vibrated again she gasped. She also _needed_ to get her butt in gear if she was going to make it to the party, relatively on time. Rolling her eyes as she read the threatening texts from Matt and Caroline demanding her presence at the Salvatore house. She replied to them as she made sure she had everything she'd need and her eyes narrowed when she got a text from Damon.

**Remind me again why we're going through with this party?**

Bonnie couldn't help bug laugh as she read the text, of course he'd try to get out of it _as_ the party started.

_**Because that's how friendships work Damon. When your friends come back from the dead you string up balloons and drown your nostalgia with the nearest bottle of bourbon.**_

**Bourbon, yes. Pretending to care as people 'fill me in' on the endless list of nothing I missed while we were dead - LOUD NO**

**_Since when do you pretend to care Salvatore? Also, is everyone there already? I'm kind of second-guessing these shoes._**

She could practically hear his eyes roll as he typed a response.

**Get here now, between Enzo and Alaric and my actual girlfriend I might have to consider intravenous methods of getting booze into my body.**

**_Save some for me, you're not the only one up Ugh's Creek without a paddle._**

**You better not be texting while driving, Bennett.**

**_Not driving. Still second-guessing shoes._**

**Typical. Never there for me when I need you.**

**_I like to mix it up every now and then. Wouldn't want you getting attached._**

**Bit late for that. Get here now or the bourbon gets it**

**_Copy that._**

Chewing her bottom lip Bonnie scanned her eyes over her outfit once more in her full length mirror before nodding her head.

It was now or never.

* * *

><p><strong>*dances like Damon to "Whatta Man"*<strong>

**I know this was short BUT because these two have me moonwalking on rainbows and gushing left, right and centre I will post another chapter soon after this one, like SOON-soon. I just really wanted to get that leftover Beremy out of my teeth. _Ugh_**

**Stay excellent**


	5. Chapter 5

_**I keep trying to lay off of Elena's character development (or the actual **_**regression**_** thereof) but I just CAN'T anymore. What a load of **_**poo**_**! **_**UGH**

_**And oh **_**look**_**, Caroline's being set up for yet **_**another**_** love interest. Care-Bear is my girl but, really? **_**Again**_**? (#Klaroline? #sadface)**_

**Look**_**. I'd be happy with a well-written Bamon friendship. I'm talking **_**Lexi/Stefan**_** friendship, you know? Legitimate **_**foundation**_** and **_**trust**_** and **_**shit**_**. None of that "will they/won't they" taking precedence over the friendship - don't toy with my feelings! (Cough, Steroline, Cough) I want Damon fighting in Bonnie's corner when everything goes South (which it **_**will**_** in the show I'm sure) and I don't wanna hear shit from Elena about it either. *flicks her aside***_

_**Hopefully this was worth all the whining. **_

_**Disclaimer for everything except my version of TVD-land. This madness is all mine**_

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><p><strong>Step Five: Be Able To GiveTake Compliments**

Bonnie was in _hysterics_. It turned out that Stefan was an exceptional lip sync-er who had a brain full of lyrics from all the best eras of music. She made him promise to a karaoke night in the future. Or a lip-sync battle at the very least. When his car pulled up into the driveway of the lake house Bonnie's mood turned somber for a few moments. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been here...**wait**, when Jeremy was caught up in all _The Five_ business and Shane was grooming her to be his personal _wicked-witch-of-the-west_. Oh yeah, **that**. Killing the engine, Stefan turned to her and pursed his lips waiting to gage her reaction.

"You'd tell me if any of this bothered you right?" Stefan asked, his voice soft yet insistent. Bonnie's eyes flitted to his face and she shrugged his words off with a breezy indifference passing over her features.

"I was just being difficult before," Bonnie explained, "I _do_ need a break and of course everyone should come along for the trip too. _Especially_ you," Bonnie emphasized, "I have a better idea of you and Damon now and I can't even _begin_ to imagine what you must have been going through." Stefan looked stuck somewhere between agreeing and scoffing.

"Your compassion is endless," Stefan commented with a dry chuckle, "But you are right, we all need a quick breather at the _very_ least, so _this_ before you," he waved a hand at the lake house and then the cars pulling up next to them, "is the combined efforts of myself, Damon and Elena. Caroline wasn't allowed to help plan anything because she threw _the_ party of _all_ parties that got you _incredibly_ drunk if I remember correctly -"

"Which you do." Bonnie sighed.

"- Which I _do_," Stefan said with a bright smile as if he were replaying the memory of Bonnie's behaviour that night over in his head. "You were most certainly on a mission."

"Shut up," Bonnie muttered trying to reign in her amusement, "I wasn't the _only_ one!" She reminded him with a triumphant cackle as she hopped out of his car and made the way to the trunk. "We both know I'm not alone in my quest for adventure."

"_Adventure_?" Stefan echoed while Bonnie nodded her head. He strung their bags onto his one arm and smirked when she realized he didn't need her help. "Is that what we're calling it?"

"Well, considering she's the _only_ human here in a cabin full of notoriously _idiotic_ vampires and a baby _wolf_ - I'd say she's _plenty_ adventurous... well, except for you mate," Enzo said nodding to Alaric as they stepped out into the driveway from the car and got their bags. "You haven't done anything _remotely_ interesting in fact. No offense," he offered feebly to Damon, Elena, Caroline and Stefan who'd all paused in their own actions to scowl at him, "Alaric here hasn't been around me long enough to do something insipid but I _suppose_ it's only a matter of time." Bonnie rolled her eyes and before anyone could say anything she flicked her wrist, causing Alaric's hand to rise up and deliver a swift smack to the back of Enzo's head. Elena watched as the tick in Damon's jaw began working as his eyes stayed glued to Bonnie.

"I'd bear that in mind if I were you." Bonnie said with a satisfied smirk, knowing Enzo's eyes had been on her throughout the entire exchange. "This is supposed to be a _pleasant_ little holiday and as much as I would get a **kick** out of **kicking** you I don't think now is the time for any of that." Enzo grinned wolfishly.

"I liked the fire in your eyes when you said that you know." Enzo said, and Bonnie swallowed down the quick repulsion that tickled the back of her throat. She didn't bother hiding her disgust.

"How about I set _fire_ to _your eyes_, hmm?" Bonnie asked, her shoulders tensing as she balled her hands into fists. Stefan put his free hand on her shoulder, and, while carrying all their things and muttering something in an effort to pacify her, steered her in the direction of the house. Damon watched as Bonnie trudged up the steps with a haughty flick of her hips and hair and disappeared into the house before he turned to Enzo. Immediately both vampires' faces hardened.

"Care to _explain_ yourself this time, Enzo?" Damon asked, trying his best to keep his cool. Enzo rolled his eyes at Damon's overbearing older brother routine. IT had gotten old, **fast**.

"I was just being friendly. Surely, the little witch has been around _your_ type enough to withstand some decent banter." Damon scoffed before he could help it, they all knew how volatile Bonnie's powers were _before_ they'd even crossed back over to Earth, provoking her wasn't wise. Who knew what happened if she used too much of it...He couldn't believe that this is what everyone else had had to put up with _him_ all those spells ago. No wonder they all lost it. Damon tried to stop picturing slapping the snot out of Enzo long enough to cut him down to size.

"This weekend isn't about _witches_ and _vampires_ and _werewolves_," Damon pointed out with that usual degrading tone of his, as his bright eyes turned wild, "_This_ weekend is about a girl who lost pretty much _all_ the family she has, the girl who restored my faith in the term _'friendship'_, who died a bunch of times for reasons that piss me off _to this day_, and got stuck with **us** as some twisted consolation prize -"

"Speak for yourself." Caroline interrupted, crossing her arms as she frowned at Damon's words. Tyler's eyes darted between everyone's faces.

"I **am**," Damon snapped in the blonde's direction before turning back to face Enzo, "It's one thing to throw your toys out of the cot while you were on the _Other Side_, or to hit on Caroline out of _boredom_ or even sass my brother but I will _not_ let you so much as dampen Bonnie's _mood_ - not when her health is stake because of her magic. **You got that**?" Damon hissed through his teeth, sneering as he stepped into Enzo's space. Damon remembered Bonnie's body reacting to big spells in the past and boy did she use the Mother of all spells to get them back. His eyes scoured Enzo's face for the smallest sign that his message had been received. Enzo's jaw clenched and un-clenched before he dipped his head and nodded; the most submissive thing any of them had _ever_ seen him do. Damon pulled a face before turning around and heading back to his car without a backward glance. Elena felt a pang of jealousy from the entire exchange, she wished that she could have gotten it right with Damon like Bonnie obviously had with their friendship. Usually Damon would have broken a limb, hell even _killed someone_ when he became this passionate about something/someone's safety or well-being. Damon was still himself with Bonnie, but he was rational, considerate, he slowed down so that Bonnie could catch up or requested she do the same when the situation's were reversed and Elena had never _once_ seen them genuinely fight since they came back. The bickering was something _everyone_ was now subject to.

Elena and Damon had remained the same: passionate to a fault, except now there was no imminent danger to encourage recklessness or spontaneous sex. There were no ultimatums, dramatic pauses or spells that needed to be broken or countered to ascertain peace. There was nothing standing in between them - yet that seemed to be the cause of this subtly growing distance Elena felt.  
>When Bonnie and Damon returned Bonnie had set Mystic Falls alight, <em>magically speaking<em>, burning the wards that kept supernaturals out to a crisp so that everyone could come home. She'd fixed everything in a dramatic and admittedly **terrifying** display of power and then she'd simply reverted to the peaceful, whimsical little thing she'd always been. Everyone around her seemed to be doing all the changing, Elena thought as she followed Damon to get their bags and head inside. Caroline had finally given up trying to relive the "good old days" in an effort to keep everyone bonded, jumping aboard Bonnie's 'now or never' wagon instead. Matt and Tyler had also caught wind of Bonnie's new attitude, commending her and making doubly sure she knew just how badly she was missed and the state their lives were in without her. Damon had taken on some of Bonnie's qualities; her compassion and empathy - which floored just about _everyone_. Even Stefan had begun to take to Bonnie as well (more than he had in the past), which, considering how cold and distant he'd been with everyone else prior to her and his brother's resurrection, was a surprise in itself. Stefan laughed more, he and Damon spent time with just the two of them and they seemed to take it upon themselves to become Bonnie's make-shift older brothers. Which, _of course_, Elena encouraged completely, why wouldn't she? But she couldn't help but feel that an era was coming to an end and that whatever they were on the precipice of didn't exactly have her as the main attraction.

**Yes**, she knew what that sounded like but she'd _always_ been someone's priority, and she'd been through the ringer as well. Losing Damon was the most impossible task she'd ever come to face in her entire life. She _still_ wanted him all to herself; she wanted that fire only he possessed, she wanted the promise of _adventure_ and _desire_ but Damon had become a lot more..._domesticated_ of late. Elena had never pictured Damon as a peaceful, idle person, but that's exactly who he was when they weren't at war with someone or other... _apparently_. When she asked him about it he outright blamed Bonnie much to said witch's dismay. They'd lived together for so long he claimed that it had ruined _every_ fantasy of his regarding women as well as putting an end to his _'Spartan'_ phase as they both called it. He said he preferred the peace, something he himself never thought he'd say. So the illusion was shattered for him and thus he was currently trying to re-boot his sex drive. The whole spiel to Elena earned him the cold shoulder and a classic aneurysm for old time's sake but Bonnie was giggling the entire time. Elena didn't know whether to smile or pull her hair out at that.

All Elena had wanted for the longest time was for Bonnie and Damon to bury the hatchet and just _accept_ the roles that they had in the other's lives. When it came down to it **Bonnie** was the one Damon had been banking on to fix the situation with the Other Side and Elena knew that that carried a lot of weight with someone as chronically cynical as Damon Salvatore. But Elena was finding it hard to keep her smile sincere when it became evident just _how_ _much_ Damon had grown to care about Bonnie. Stefan, too. They fussed over the Bennett girl, checked in on her constantly (though it had been mere _weeks_ since her return), they sought out her advice, her help and sometimes...just, **her**. Elena knew if she lingered in this weird grey area with Bonnie a little longer that they may never get back to that healthy friendship that they'd been fighting for during all of this. That knowledge terrified the Gilbert vampire. Elena _needed_ Bonnie, like she needed her _brother_ or all the _photo's_ that she'd burnt down of her parents when she set her old house aflame - like an idiot. Bonnie's friendship was one of few things Elena could still be proud of and the fact that she might be losing that...it had her on the edge.

After Bonnie and Jeremy broke up and Elena found out she thought it was a joke. _Why_ would Bonnie not want to be with Jeremy anymore? Like her own relationship with Damon, those two had to fight against insane odds just to freaking **touch** each other. So why would she give that up? And what was Elena meant to say when her best friend says she's fallen out of love with her brother? So she nodded and did her best small smile, letting Caroline's endless monologue fill up the spaces between her and Bonnie. Walking into the lake house Elena was assaulted with wave after wave of nostalgia as she and Damon settled in before finding everyone else. Elena's vampire hearing latched onto the distinct sound of Bonnie's bubbling laughter, she followed Damon out to the lake and they spotted Stefan and Bonnie laughing as the duo snickered and whispered while looking out over the edge of the pier some distance away. They both looked so _happy_ right then, Elena thought to herself, happier than she'd ever thought Stefan would be again and as happy as she always remembered Bonnie to be when they were kids and everything was simpler.

"Those two are going to cause trouble, I can _smell_ it." Damon muttered with mock distrust colouring his voice. Stefan turned and flipped him off, having heard every word. Bonnie spun around and waved at them wildly, almost knocking Stefan over in the process. Elena wiggled her fingers at her brunette friend and smiled.

"Probably," she said, "but that might be fun." Damon's brow quirked at her response. Elena's aversion to finding a natural rhythm in her life never ceased to shock him. He thought he had a flair for the dramatic.

"_Fun_?" Damon echoed, "Nothing good comes from my brother trying to have fun, _especially_ with Bonnie. Backgammon for example, or knitting. The work of the _devil_ _himself_, you'll agree." Elena heard Stefan laugh then, _really_ laugh. Both her and Bonnie eyed him out curiously as they made their way over to where Damon and Elena were standing.

"Apparently nothing good happens when I try and have fun, especially with _you_." Stefan explained to Bonnie as they came to a stand still in front of the vampire couple. "He says that we're going to cause _trouble_." Bonnie pulled an 'is that so?' face and grinned cheekily up at Damon who crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes in response. It was jarring how quickly the tables could turn between these two; in the past Bonnie would be the one dishing out parental looks and slaps on the wrists. A 'judgy' Damon was probably Bonnie's favourite thing.

"You're so cute when you get all testy and short-tempered." Bonnie teased, both her and Stefan's eyes dancing with mischief.

"Shut up." Damon quipped, only causing Bonnie's smile to widen.

"Oh _Damon_, when will you learn that _this_," Stefan said putting an arm around Bonnie's shoulder and using his free hand to motion between the two of them, "This beautiful camaraderie between us? Is all _your_ doing." Bonnie nodded her face animated. Damon feigned boredom as he checked his fingernails on his one hand before looking back at his brother and best friend.

"_All_ I'm saying," Damon said with a lavish swish of his hands, "Is that Bonnie's **my** BFF now so I get obligatory _bestie-time_. You know, so she can braid my hair and tell me how pretty I am." He said with a broad smile with the other three laughed. Truth to be told, he'd become so accustomed to that specific silence only her presence could breed that he craved it now, that peculiar familiarity between two people in perfect quiet. It had kept him in one piece in their purgatory and _now_, to help him acclimate, he needed to fuse his and Bonnie's friendship with the 'real' world. _This_ world, one that seemed to be doing more acclimating to their return than he and Bonnie combined.

"He actually pencils it into the diary." Bonnie stage whispered to Stefan who snickered. Damon pulled a face. She and Stefan had bought him a diary not too long ago as their 'hilarious' way of saying they loved him. So he wrote in cute little anecdotes that apparently they'd been reading.

"_Hey_! If I wanted you and Stefan to gang up on me I would have done something more practical, like, say, start a vampire cult, or consider taxidermy as a hobby with all of Stefan's _leftovers_." Bonnie, Stefan as well as Elena all scrunched their faces up in disgust but Bonnie was the first to recover.

"The fact that those thoughts are present in your mind tells me that I have _obviously_ failed you as a moral compass." She replied, her tone sprinkled with mirth even though he knew just how much the thought of stuffed, dead animals grossed her out. "**Also**," she went on, rolling her weight between the balls of her feet and her heels, she smiled sweetly as she glanced between him and Elena. Elena, knowing that look all too well, was already wearing her sure-why-not smile but Damon raised his hands.

"I know that face," he said, "_nothing_ good comes from that face!" Bonnie sighed dramatically as the other's made their way to the foursome. Bonnie's green eyes sparkled in the bright summer sun.

"_Indulge me_." She said, her eyes locked on Damon's. Before his face broke out into a smile she'd already pumped a skinny arm into the air hissing a successful 'yes!'. "This is going to be brilliant." She promised.

* * *

><p><strong>StefanBonnie karaoke promises. Bonnie/Damon as seen by the rest of the gang. Enzo ringing some S1/2 Damon bells, _no_? A quick dip in Elena's mind as well as a peek at Damon's love for Bonnie. Because she's just great damnit**

**Stay excellent**


	6. Chapter 6

_**If you're into it give "Last Hope" by Paramore a listen 'cause that song was the cheerleader to this chapter below even though I didn't directly incorporate any lyrics.**_

_**I felt the need to point out that there's a reason the Salvatore brother's are now working so hard on their friendship with Bonnie. Stefan and Damon finally put their collective pride aside to admit how important the one is to the other - just in time for Damon and Bonnie to die. Stefan also realised a few things losing Bonnie after she once again sacrificed it all for them - it's put a lot into perspective for him. So getting them both back? Of course it'd bring them closer? in my mind at least**_

_**Thank you guys for putting up with all my notes and my take on TVD. You guys are **_**too**_** cool, man.**_

_**This whole Chapter is a flashback. The whooole thang. Timeline-wise Bamon are getting closer to coming home so there's more depth to their interactions etc blah, blah, blah (back in the real world we've paused at the first night The Lake house)**_

_**_**I Disclaim: Alles behalwe my liefde vir Bamon**_**_

* * *

><p><strong>Step Six: Don't Be A Hero<strong>

"This _supposed_ spell," Damon said, again, making sure Bonnie could see the wideness of his eyes, "Requires this eclipse, solstice _thing_ to channel in order for you to move us between dimensions to get back home?" Bonnie nodded. Damon was frowning instantly. "**No**, there has to be another way, another _witch_. _Something_!" He moved away from Bonnie as he paced in thought. Bonnie wanted to appreciate this moment, she wanted to appreciate Damon like this - him actually giving a shit about someone _outside_ of Elena and Stefan but she couldn't.

_Sure_ when the sudden surge of power had shot into her body while her and Damon were having a screaming match on the front lawn, she'd all but been burnt to a crisp. It was like a bolt of lightning according to Damon, just zapping out from between the steel grey clouds above them. It sent her flying 10 ft away from him where she smacked against the front doors of the Salvatore House. She'd never seen Damon more relieved in her life than when her eyelids fluttered open a few minutes later. When she looked into the mirror a few minutes later in his bathroom, she screamed out loud when she saw the drying blood around the edges of her mouth. Damon was about to yell at her for being loud _and_ ungrateful when he noticed all the objects that could, were floating around Bonnie as she stood there. From here on Bonnie thought it was pretty simple, she already had her trusty Grimoire back and now she had her powers too. They had _hope_ now! And Bonnie being Bonnie began to worry afresh about everything back on Earth.

Who knew how much time had passed on Earth? Who knew what new crise_s_ had befallen all of their friends? Who _knew_ what they'd left behind to be stuck in this endless silence in the parallel world they'd found themselves in. As she moved to open her mouth Damon's form loomed over her, hands flailing as he spoke. "Your magic, you say it's back, but we _both_ know the restrictions and rules that your kind live by. And I don't know," his eyebrows lifted and moved as he spoke, "But with my luck the magic you can wield without killing yourself and maybe even the spell itself is only built for _one_ person...like I'm sure your Grams' intended." Bonnie swallowed as she held his gaze. "Only _you_ were meant to pass into here Bonnie." He said, his voice hard. He tried to will his thought process into her mind by locking gazes with her, but the look in her eyes said that she was having none of it.

"But you came with me," Bonnie's voice taking on an edge of desperation that surprised even her, "You came with me and it _worked_." Damon nodded, agreeing, but she knew that he had another counter-point waiting in the wings. She knew how he felt about having hope.

"Yes, but we don't know _who_ cast the spell," he pointed out, his sound logic infuriating her, "We don't even know _why_ it worked in the first place. It really would serve as poetic justice for me to have to be stuck here for all of eternity." Bonnie shook her head angrily. "Bonnie, think about it. I was _never_ meant to be here."

"**I don't care**!" She exclaimed, her voice bouncing off of the walls of the living room in the alternate dimension's Salvatore Boarding House. "It worked the first time so it'll work _this_ time too!" She said, daring him to argue. They locked eyes again while Bonnie was racking her brain for anything more she could conjure up from her years of magical knowledge, while Damon's brain had selected only one distinct memory and chosen this precise moment to play it out to him. Him, with a fire poker to Bonnie's throat. His eyes bloodshot and tears seconds from falling as he realised that she didn't have a plan. As he realised just _how much_ he relied on Bonnie for everything to work out in the end. As he realised just how much he was willing to do for his brother. He was seeing the same look in Bonnie's eyes now as she stood an arm's length away from him. Her eyes unfocused and speculative as she ran through every shred of information she had about magic, no doubt. She looked like she was fraying at the edges and that all she needed was a little sliver of hope, just _one_, a small something to tide her over so that she could push through to get them home. And Damon wanted to give that to her, more than anything. Yes, because it meant he'd get home to his brother and Elena but also because Damon had learned to care about Bonnie. **Love** her even, in his own way that nine times out of ten never really made sense. So he wanted _her_ to get home. He wanted her to stay strong because he _knew_ she could, he knew that outside of the memory of his mother, Bonnie was probably the strongest woman he knew. Also the most loyal and **stubborn**, but he wouldn't get into that now.

"_Bonnie_ -" he began but she cut him off with a piercing look.

"Damon, if you know me at **all**, you'd know that I'd **never** leave you behind." She said, her voice thick with emotion. Damon didn't know why she was being so difficult? He was giving her and the rest of the world a free pass to be rid of him for _good_. Old Bonnie would have burst into song.

Then again, he'd _lost_ the Old Bonnie - **twice**, he'd had to move her body around the first time himself when she faked her own death. The memory still irked him when he remembered that decade dance, when he thought of when Klaus played _'Guess Who'_ with Elena for her blood. He remembered wondering aloud if there was no way Bonnie could bend the odds more in her favour as they danced, something he made sure he did in similar situations - it was _Vampire Survival 101_. A look passed over her face once the words left his mouth and she smiled in a way that usually only reserved for sneaky foxes like himself and looked him dead in the eye and said, "Careful Damon, I might start to think you actually care." and well, joke was on _her_ because the minute he realised how strong she was, how much power she carried in those dainty fingers of hers he knew that he needed her on his side. _But_...being Damon, and his crazy eyes when it came to the Petrova women, he never really bothered investing anything into Bonnie really - yet _somehow_, they'd reached a mutual understanding anyway, a begrudging respect one might have for another opponent when there's a draw. That's why he knew that Bonnie should be the one to go home. She deserved to actually _live_ for once in her miserable life.

"And despite what you know of _me_, I'm not going to ask you to kill yourself trying to take me with you. I've **lived**." Bonnie's eyes ballooned as her head reared back in shock.

"How the **hell** am I supposed to go back without you? **Huh**?" She all but screeched at him her green eyes glossy with angry tears, "Oh _hey_ Elena, _hey_ Stefan" she forced a cheerful tone offset by her hysterical expression, "I'm _so sorry_ but even though Damon and I got sucked into a different dimension he said it was cool if I left him behind so here **I **am!" She swung her arms out at him with a growl. "Don't be an **idiot**, Damon. I know for a fact that between the two of us, it will be _you_ - they'll choose you every time. You guys are immortal, there's so much more hanging in the balance. You lot are in it for the long haul with each other. Memories of me will become just that, _memories_. You guys have the opportunity to live these happy lives I've seen you move towards - for _forever_ and that's amazing. I'm not throwing that away for a few years on Earth for myself while I fight off the bad guys as I go _grey_. No thank you." Damon glared at her then in earnest. "If anyone's getting sent back, it's **you**." Never in his life had Damon felt the human side of himself want to throttle a woman so much in **all** of his existence. He couldn't believe how perfectly serious Bonnie was being. She'd seen him vulnerable, furious, murderous, crying and snivelling but now she was about to see an entirely new side of him.

"After everything, _that's_ it? _That's_ what you're going with?" He asked, his voice having taken on a steely coolness that caught his favourite witch off guard. "You're just going to send me off and let yourself die **alone** here? _That's_ your brilliant plan?" Her wide eyes scanned his face for something, _what_, he'll never know. She swallowed and nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Yes." She said. Her voice only _just_ betraying the confidence she was trying to muster up. She'd gotten _far_ too good at that.

"You're an idiot." He said, his voice casual and unperturbed. Bonnie's eyes fell to the floor and her breathing hitched as she tried to steady her emotions. Before she could look up again Damon had her circled in his arms. This was unchartered territory for her - to her knowledge at least. He held her like this for a while, their bodies moving slowly side to side as he propped his chin up on top of her head. "I'm not going anywhere without you." He said, moving away so that they could look at each other. "I _refuse_." He wasn't even upset when he saw genuine surprise flicker over her features, like a part of her believed that he would have left her. A part of him thought he might have too but that part died a quick death once those words left his mouth. He **wouldn't** leave her, it didn't make sense to forsake someone who he'd taken so much from and who continued to give to him after everything he'd caused. A soft chuckle escaped him at her expression and she smiled too, her small arms stuck between their bodies, balled up in the fabric of his flannel shirt. He saw it then. The hope she'd been looking for, he saw the familiar flicker of determination burn behind her orbs.

"Thank you for saying that." She said, meaning it from the bottom of her heart.

"Thank you for knocking enough sense into me to _mean_ it." He replied breezily. "Come on, I'll make us something to eat and we'll figure this out together." Bonnie watched as he picked up her teddy bear, _Cuddles_, tucked it under his arm and motioned for her to follow him. "Pancakes?" He called teasingly over her shoulder, laughing when heard her gasp and hiss 'you wouldn't dare'. "I'm kidding, I'll make us some eggs." Bonnie's mouth was quirked to the side and she cleared her throat as they arrived in the kitchen.

"Damon?" She asked, her voice suddenly shy, immediately garnering his attention. He hummed in response as he collected everything he'd need to cook. "I wanted to talk to you about something personal."

"Shoot." The blue eyed vampire said, throwing a quick smile her way before he grabbed a frying pan and began fiddling with the knobs on the stove top. She watched his face as she began to form the sentence that had been bouncing around in her head for a while now.

"I know you've got that bagged blood supply going on at the moment, but you keep complaining about it..." Damon had stilled his movements after the word blood left her mouth. **All** he wanted was fresh blood. Outside of getting home and his concern for Bonnie, blood was a consistent thought in his mind. More so when he smelled her blood as he lifted her up from where she was thrown aside like a rag doll by that freak lightning bolt. The magic returning to her blood coupled with his lack of fresh sampling of late meant that his restraint was being tested as he hovered over an unconscious Bonnie Bennett. Her blood drew him closer to her neck with every second longer he spent ogling her. He blinked as he returned to Bonnie's curious expression as they stood in the kitchen opposite one another. Rolling her eyes quickly she smiled as she looked down. Squaring her shoulders she looked him dead in the eye. "So, I wanted you to know that if you wanted some of my blood... You could _have_ some." She rapped her fingertips on the smooth kitchen counter as he stood there staring at her. "**Okay**." She said, nodding to herself. "I'll leave you to it then." He heard her suck air in through her teeth as she left, clearly embarrassed. He looked down at the pan in front of him with the tray of eggs ready and waiting.

"Well what do you know." He said aloud. "Breakfast might actually become my favourite meal of the day again."

* * *

><p>When Damon knocked on Bonnie's door they were both aware of how she'd probably run through a handful of things to say to him - mentally preparing herself for his inevitable idiocy. He peeked through the door as he cracked it open slowly only stepping through when he saw her lying on her bed. In her usual Bonnie-fashion she was lying with her one foot snug under the pillows at the top of her bed while the rest of her body stuck out in different directions. She claimed it was <em>comfortable<em> and _he_ claimed her sex-life wasn't consistent enough for her to have to accommodate someone else in bed with her. To which she scoffed and called him a Strumpet, which he grinned at in response. Her green eyes tracked him as he walked towards her and her bed. Even upside down Damon made a prettier picture than most and Bonnie grumbled inwardly. She wasn't hard on the eyes or anything herself but with Damon a good percentage of his **slap-me** factor came from his stupid face. Like _now_, how he was looking at her like he wanted to be _nice_ to her. She narrowed her eyes and he rolled his in return like he knew she'd do that.

"Hear me out." He said as he rearranged her leg and arm closest to him to make some space and laid down next to her, shoulder to shoulder on the spring coil 90's mattress. "I wanted to say thank you." She turned to look at him then, disbelieving. "I was _shocked_," he exclaimed, his eyes bulging, "I never thought you'd willingly help me out with stuff like that." He admitted and she nodded slowly.

"Neither did I, but I'm not relying so much on my assumptions anymore." Damon smiled warmly, so warmly in fact that it made Bonnie a little antsy. She didn't know what to do with someone, especially Damon, actually being _present_ with her and just...hanging out. She couldn't remember the last time she just did nothing for the sake of it. But there they laid, smiling tentatively at each other like they knew something the rest of the world didn't.

"Oh?" Damon asked, thoroughly intrigued. He knew horribly little about her and all she'd done of late was hold him while he had his millionth nervous breakdown, not complain about the food he put in front of her and partake in his idea of witty humour with some of her own. She'd gone out of her way to accommodate him and he had nothing to show for all the leaps and bounds they'd made where he was concerned.

"Yeah. I was told I was _extremely_ judgmental in my witch-y days," she explained her green eyes goading him, "but I've learnt that nothing is at it seems." Damon nodded.

"I hate to say I told you so but -" she cut him off with a wave of her hand.

"When have you _ever_ made an attempt at giving me sage advice?" She pressed, her pretty brows curled in curiosity. He tried to think of one drawing out an 'uhh' sound and the more obvious it became that he was drawing a blank Bonnie mimicked the sounds he made and laughed at his speechlessness. "That's what I _thought_." She said a triumphant note in her tone and zero resentment. Damon tutted but then his face turned serious. A small part of Bonnie squeaked in fear, wondering if he was going to try and drink from her now or something. She was thinking more along the lines of pouring some into those crystal tumblers he loved so much.

"_Relax_," he said softly and she remembered that he was a vampire. He could probably hear her heart screaming 'no' as it rattled against her chest. "This isn't about the _blood_. Not _yet_," he went on, looking up at the light fixture dangling above them, "I wanted to talk to you about something personal."

"**Oh**? Okay, sure." Bonnie replied easily, ready to divulge her every fear as long as Damon didn't decide to suddenly treat her like a _Strawberry-Witch With Sprinkles_ milkshake. Yes, she offered him blood because she was trying to meet him halfway, trying to show him that she did in fact trust him. You _know_, as long as he didn't ruin it by trying to drink from her neck, or _worse_, bring up her sex life with Jeremy. Also, she wanted him to be as strong as possible in case something happened and she needed his brute strength. "Ask away." she said, settling back into the mattress, her eyes trailing over the navy blue walls and the way the sunlight and dust motes came dancing in through the window.

"What do you think of me?" He asked, his voice neutral, "No long-winded monologues, just, in a _sentence_. What do you think?" He turned then and looked over and down at Bonnie's profile. Her brows furrowed and she chewed the corner of her mouth as she thought. With a quick twist of her neck green eyes met blue and Bonnie smiled suddenly, confusing Damon.

"I think you've been one of the biggest lessons in my life," she said, a faraway looked in her eyes now, "I think you're _strong_ ...and _loyal_ and ... I think, I, no, no." Her eyes snapped back into focus as she shook her head, "I _know_ that I trust you. And I know that you trust me too." She said, with a smirk. Damon didn't even bother denying it. All he kept hearing was that somehow someone like Bonnie had managed to find it in herself and in him as well to forge a sense of trust there. That alone broke several laws of nature. _No wonder they'd been exiled to another dimension_, he mocked inwardly. Bonnie's shoulder bumped his and he came out of his head. "What about you?" She asked, "What do you think of me?"

"I think," he began, drawing out the word as he looked at her. Bonnie Bennett, Mystic Fall's very own Get Out Of Jail Free card, he made a mental note to work that into a conversation at some point with her, her glare alone would make his day. "Uh, I think that you're _brave_," he said watching all the small nuances of her features changing as she listened to him talking, "I think you're more powerful than anyone's _ever_ given you credit for, magic or no, and I think that you and I were meant to meet."

"Is that so?" She asked, all traces of teasing gone, genuine curiosity having taken over. He nodded.

"You've taught me things Stefan has been trying to drill into my head since he convinced me to complete the transition. _Without even trying you get me to try._ I call it the _Bonnie_ _Effect_," they laughed, "It's a pain in my ass though, ugh," he groaned, "**You're** a pain in my ass." He said with a chuckle bubbling in his throat. Bonnie laughed along with him.

"_Please_," Bonnie said wiping away a tear, "Stop. Because now I'm actually starting to _like_ you as a person." She said and then they both grew quiet and stared at one another before bursting out into loud peals of laughter. When they sobered several moments their eyes met again and Damon sighed, honing in on the individual flecks of hazel he could see shimmering in her eyes.

"We're _too_ similar," Damon said, nodded almost to himself, "Our only options are enemies or besties." He held out both of his hands as he spoke, pretending to weigh the options between the two. Bonnie wiggled her mouth side to side as she pretended to give it some thought.

"Aren't we already friends though?" She asked, referring to when Damon basically got her into a verbal contract with him when he declared them friends.

"**Besties** is totally different," he countered looking surprisingly serious, "For _one_, you get to see me without make-up on." Bonnie played along with him ooh-ing and aah-ing appropriately, "You get the honour of waxing my upper lip at sleep-overs," he said with a wink which had Bonnie cracking up again, "_Plus_, we'll get to do more stuff like _this_." He pointed out, waving a hand between them. Bonnie nodded and fell back, folding her arms behind her head, the same thing Damon did on his side of the bed too. They caught each other's eye and Bonnie scoffed while Damon prodded at her with his elbow nearest to her.

"We're too similar." She said with a soft laugh.

"_Way_ too similar." Damon agreed. "_Bon_?" He asked after a few moments of nice silence. She hummed and he turned and saw that her eyes were closed as she waited for him to keep talking. "I want you to stop putting yourself last." He said, his voice as soft and light as he could muster, he didn't want to ruin what they'd just created together but it had to be said. When she didn't open her eyes or anything he forged on, "I wish someone had gotten that through to me when I needed them to. I let my obsession with someone's whose idea of love was angry sex and mystery rule my whole existence. The bitter, violent person you met was the armour I built around the human me, the one who loved and dreamed and believed. I watched as Katherine choked what was good out of me and then left me with scraps of myself that would never be good enough for anyone - she broke me in, wore me out and tossed me away and I let her. Even when I was human you'd have still surpassed me in every field. You're too good for our world. You need someone like me to help you sift through it all. But I need you to fight for yourself Bon, because I'm ready to fight for you whenever you want. I owe you _that_ much."

"You _owe_ me?" She echoed numbly. He pursed his lips thoughtfully.

"That and I actually **want** to." He admitted and Bonnie knew that somewhere, perhaps in a similar parallel universe, a Unicorn had '_poofed'_ into existence because of Damon's confession. And the thought brought a stupid smile to her face.

* * *

><p><strong>"It's just a spark but it's enough"<strong>

**Yes. Yes. A thousand times yes.**

* * *

><p><strong>For people looking for more (romantic) Bamon centric S6 stuff from me (or even if ya weren't), hop on over to <em>Dulce Domum<em>. I'll be updating that soon as well  
><strong>

**Stay excellent**


	7. Chapter 7

_**This follows the last flashback with Bamon in the other dimension.**_

_**You lot are brilliant. Soak up your awesomeness while you read this new chapter**_

_**There are a couple of expletives in here, me scuzie.**_

_**Also "Keep Your Head Up" by Ben Howard is the soundtrack for this**_

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><p><strong>Step Seven: Learn To Compromise<strong>

After Damon and Bonnie decided to commit to being so called 'besties' a sense of synchronicity developed between them. They knew that neither was willing to leave without the other so they employed every means possible to come up with a viable solution to the 'one person pass' that they were 90 % bound the spell - a risk neither of them even considered taking. Which is how Bonnie found herself channelling Damon in the back yard of the Salvatore Boarding House. She needed to centre herself and seek some kind of 'inner knowledge' that she believed to have been planted there when they arrived in this dimension – logic that Damon had to get behind because every other venture drew up a blank. Truth be told it made sense for some signature of some sort to be imprinted on them upon their arrival in this world, some kind of thread, however frayed, to tug on to lead them back home. All spells had a history that was traceable and discoverable, why would this one be any different? If they could find the thread they could hone in on the nature of the spell and configure it so that two people could pass through – sounded simple enough…

"Damon, you need to sit _still_." Bonnie chastised him for the umpteenth time and he sighed dramatically, flailed his arms around a bit, huffed then crossed his arms and closed his eyes again. Bonnie tisked at his antics but let it slide; she was impressed he'd managed to sit here for as long as they had. "Five more minutes then we can go back inside and you can dance around the house like you're want to do."

"Only if you join in again." He said with a sly smirk, referring to a few weeks ago when she had gotten drunk enough to dance around the house with him, providing them both with some much needed relief.

"Shut up." She said, slapping lightly at his chest and he grinned while his eyes stayed closed. "That was a once off."

"_Boo_." He whispered, snickering when she pinched his side. "Don't you have some channelling to do missy? I'm getting old here."

"Wait shut up." Bonnie hissed, her tone causing Damon to immediately become alert. "I…Da-Damon…" Damon's eyes opened and he saw Bonnie's mouth slightly open, her eyes wide and bleeding an incredible white light that stung his eyes a little. "I found it."

"No shit." He muttered, watching as her eyes dimmed to their natural state, secretly more at ease with her face this way. He'd seen her do magic before and it _never_ went like that.

"I found it." She said her grin wide and infectious, overrun with hope and promise and Damon tried to suppress his ever growing hope as he sat across from her but Bonnie's expression was too contagious so they both sat on the lawn beaming at each other like morons.

* * *

><p>"WHAT?" Damon yelled once Bonnie had finished talking. She was shaking her head unhappily at him as she watched him pace at an unhuman speed before he stopped right in front of her; red-faced and inconsolable. She'd found an additional chant to get them both through but it came with a price, the spell could only be done once so there was no room for negotiation really.<p>

"What do you mean _what_?" Bonnie looked at him annoyed, "It's a _solution_ Damon, it's the only way to get us home."

"**No**," he exclaimed, "It's a way to get _me_ home and _you_ in an indefinite coma." He ran his hands through his hair angrily, "**Not** a solution."

"Think about _Elena_." Bonnie tried coaxing him as she stepped towards him, "Think about your brother, he misses you, she misses you, let's go **home**."

"**Don't**!" Damon barked, "_Don't_ taunt me like that, don't think that _that_ outweighs your health and safety Bonnie. For _**fuck sakes**_! How many more times until you learn what happens when you let yourself get slaughtered on the altar of someone else?" He really got in her face then, "This _isn't_ a solution Bonnie, this _isn't_ an option, bringing you back without the guarantee of you ever actually being able to _live_ – that's no solution at all. We're starting over."

"We _can't_ start over!" She yelled, pulling at his shoulders so he'd look at her again, "We've been doing this for _months_ and it finally came to me. **This** Damon, this chance that leaves me drained but alive - _this_ is _all_ we have." Damon shook his head stubbornly.

"_Not good enough_." He spat and shoved her away. She growled angrily.

"I don't need your permission to do the spell." She pointed out with defiance clear in her eyes. He spun around and glared at her. There was a thick silence for a few moments before her words seemed to hit home in his head.

"I _dare_ you," Damon hissed, right back in her face, "I'll pour blood down your mouth so quickly you'll wake up back home a vampire. **Don't** push me." He vowed. Her eyes widened.

"You _wouldn't_." She gasped. He looked at her incredulously.

"_No_?" He challenged crossing his arms over as he loomed over her, seething. "How else would you wake up?" He ground out, "_Hmm_?"

"Wait." She said her eyes on the floor as something ran through her head almost too quickly to understand and then it hit her and her eyes ballooned as they returned to his face. "Your blood and mine. The _thread_ is in our blood and your blood will make me stronger like mine makes you stronger, right?"

"…_Why_?" Damon asked, justifiably apprehensive. Bonnie began pacing and nodding as she thought it through. It would work.

"We need to open a blood bond; we need to make our blood one entity, to pass through as one and to make sure I stay coherent and awake throughout the spell." Bonnie explained.

"A **blood** bond?" Damon's face was overcome with trepidation and discomfort.

"…Nothing like _that_! We just both have to feed on each other as we pass through to link us together, if we pass through as _one_ then the spell won't _drain_ me."

"You're sure?" He asked, already on board in his mind. He didn't care if he had to kiss her at this point, hell, _sleep_ with her, who would hold it against them if it got them home? What was a little blood between friends? Bonnie nodded and exhaled, getting that 'business-y' look on her face as she turned and walked away, probably to find some herb or insect wing or _whatever_.

* * *

><p>"You <em>know<em>," Bonnie was saying as she winced a little as his teeth pulled out of her wrist, "You probably wouldn't need to feed so much if you didn't fight me on everything so often." He laughed dryly as he stuck his wrist in her mouth, grinning when some of his blood smeared across her cheek. She glared at him before taking a sip of his blood and letting her eyes flutter closed. He liked seeing her like this, actually vulnerable to a feeling that _wasn't_ self-righteousness. She actually enjoyed drinking his blood, he knew. The flush in her skin was testament to that – as well as her embarrassment and self-loathing after he fed her. And boy did he enjoy drinking her blood – holy **balls**. She tasted even better than she did on Earth, he blamed the cosmos for that – her blood seemed to reach inside of him and warm everything it touched, heal him, making him feel more tethered to the ground. But he was trying not to look too deeply into it. It was _Bonnie_ after all, compliment the girl and she'll lecture you for it. As she wiped her mouth she shook her head as if she could hear his thoughts.

"What?" Damon asked, giving her a look that said don't-bother-denying-it and she sighed softly looking at everything except him until he cleared his throat.

"Nothing," She said shaking her head for good measure, "It doesn't matter."

"Does to me if it's got you all worked up." He said leaning back to rest on his hands as they were splayed behind him as the two of them sat on the carpet near the fire.

"_Well_," Bonnie said, clearly already disappointed in herself for talking about it, "They say that the truth is circumstantial, right?"

"Probably," Damon replied breezily, "I don't really listen when people talk." Bonnie shook her head but there was a small smile on her face before she became serious. She waited a few moments to make sure he'd actually hear her out before she began talking. He nodded to encourage her.

"On Earth I became this person, this martyr, this shell of a human and I thought it was who I was supposed to be but being here and fighting with _you_ of all people about the way I've been treating myself for the last five years…I don't…I don't know if I _want_ to go back to Mystic Falls," she waved Damon's expression off, "I want to go back to _Earth_ for sure," she clarified, "Just not Mystic Falls." He frowned then and it stayed there – that sullen expression on his face, Bonnie would have poked fun at him if it didn't feel suddenly inappropriate to tease him after the words that had just left her mouth.

"I don't blame you." He said after the longest while and Bonnie looked down at her hands as they wound around and between one another. "But seeing as I've always been selfish with you I'm going to ask you to **stay**… _please_." Her eyes snapped up and connected with his. "They need you Bonnie…" he drew in a breath and leaned forward to bore his eyes into hers, "_I_ need you." Bonnie swallowed and moved away.

"That's not fair." She muttered softly and Damon nodded, watching as she stood to her feet. "I'm –"

"Running away instead of facing the situation head-on? _Sure_, okay. See you later." Damon said, turning away from her and staring into the fire. She hesitated as she stood there watching him become still as his mind wandered off again as it usually did.

"Damon." She breathed out and walked over and flopped down next to him. "Damon, I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"I don't want to hurt you." She admitted quietly and he turned to glare at her.

"Who gives a shit about _me_?" He bit out through his teeth as he scolded her, "This isn't about me Bonnie, this is about _you_."

"I –" she drew in a breath, "It's never really ever been about me so I'm a little rusty at this," Bonnie said her eyes locked on the fire in front of her and not the guilt stricken vampire who had grown deceptively quiet next to her, "I'm not used to someone fighting for me, or protesting when I put it out on the line for them. No one but Jeremy has ever tried to _stop_ me really and I'm pretty sure the only reason he fought at all is because that's _all_ our relationship has ever been; mourning the other person or fighting to get them back and then pretending that nothing's changed when we're reunited for short periods of time. The life I had wasn't even worth _living_ Damon; I guess that's why deep down somewhere I stopped fighting for it. That's why I'd always give it up for someone else. I didn't _matter_ to me."

"Bonnie, I –"

"No… _please_," Bonnie said with tears in her eyes as she turned to look at him, "Please don't tell me how sorry you are, or how sorry you _aren't_. I know that I had my own choices to make and I made them terribly where it concerned myself but I'm scared now of resenting the one's I made because they're all I have to fall back on …and when we died I thought I'd lost that too and the thing is, it never really hit me until now. I have _nothing_ anymore Damon. Whether I'm alive or dead I'll always be a ghost, it's who I am."

"No," he hissed stubbornly, eyes shining, "_Not_ true." He pulled her into a warm hug and felt her small body relax into his, "You're not a ghost Bonnie, you're real and you're here with me and you're loved and longed after…And I _am_ sorry. I, I have no excuse for the way things worked out between us before we died. I can lie and say it was Elena but it's because I am a selfish bastard who had no lines he wouldn't cross. _Until_ I died with you and you taught me about respect and honour and compromise and all that good stuff that your parents try and drill into your head –wisdom I'm sure Sheila had her hand in dolling out to you." Bonnie nodded as she snuggled further into his hold, "Bonnie you need to tell me how to fix this, how to help you, I don't know what to do…" She pulled away from him with a watery laugh as she wiped away her tears.

"The fact that you're trying is good enough for me." She replied.

"Well. I _want_ to do more. You _need_ to stay when we get home Bonnie, instead of changing yourself to fit the circumstance or running away; you need to mould the world around you to fit _you_. You used to have fire in your eyes and we're gonna get that back."

"Oh yeah?" She asked, pulling up the sleeves of her knitted sweater and resting her elbows on her knees as she readied herself to listen to his plan.

"_Hell_ yeah," Damon exclaimed, "We're gonna get your groove back."

* * *

><p>"<strong>Keep your head up, keep your heart strong."<strong>

**Next chapter is the casting of the spell! Hurrah! (Then it's back to the Lake House)**

**Stay excellent.**


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